Focus

1 Corinthians 7:32-35

32 I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— 34 and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.

Prepare for rambling as my focus is limited.

I’ve written little lately.  I’ve read little lately.  Sadly, I’ve thought little lately.  What did come to mind was this passage above and how very true it is.  I need to refocus and I think we all fall into this trap at times.  Life is there and to live it and care for those around us, it is easy to forget why we are doing it.

I spoke to a priest about this once, how I fear I loved my family more than Our Lord.  He said to me, loving your husband is loving Our Lord.  We are called to do this.  So care for your family and love your husband for this is your vocation.

These words will stick with me always.  However, I tend to think where our focus is determines what we are doing.  One can do the exact same actions with a different focus and our intentions will determine the reason we do them.  There are times where I simply lose focus, where I care for and love my family because I am a wife and mother.  Not because it is my vocation.  Doing the exact same actions with a different focus can lead to very different results.  When I love my family without focus on Our Lord, I fail more often. I get more tired, more irritated and less patient.  When I think of my vocation, I am far more patient and I’m a better wife and mother.

So why do I lack focus?  Why do I forget why I am doing these things?  Getting sucked into the world is so easy to do.  It’s a weird place of comfort with simultaneous discomfort.  I’m still trying to figure out how to be in the world and not of it.  I suspect it will take a life time.

 

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6 thoughts on “Focus

  1. Guard against scrupulosity. Your focus is right where it needs to be. If these are your biggest worries, rest easy knowing that you have the concerns of a saint.

    Which means two things:

    1) The attacks (distractions) will increase. The devil is not interested in you, he is interested in the Christ Who resides in you. The closer you are to God, the greater the attacks.

    2) The Lord will carry you through. That is The Promise. He doesn’t promise us a life free of obstacles, he only promises to give us the strength necessary to overcome them — should you choose. His Word allows us to laugh at the devil, to mock the enemy. Engage the battle with joy, knowing the victory has already been won.

    “My triumph has begun…”

    Matt

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  2. Oh man.

    Great timing. I just spent an hour tonight talking with the woman I’m courting on this subject. Having spent her adult life pursing a religious vocation, she got her anxiety and scruplosity under control in that area, but is now having trouble with it when she looks at a future of married life.

    You are not alone.

    There’s a reason Christ said to stop worrying about tomorrow. Worry about tomorrow takes away from faithful service – instead of being a handmaid watching to fulfill the desires of her master, you become a servant hoping to be served with your own desires rather than served the will of the Lord.

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  3. Gentlemen,

    Thank you.

    Scruples never occurred to me. And as I relax throughout the morning and day, God is there. Whereas before, there would just be worry. I will remember your words.

    Chad, should your Lady ever need anything that I can help with, please don’t be afraid to ever ask.

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  4. Thanks for the offer. I showed her the post and the comments and we talked about them. She was thankful for it, agrees that its an issue, but here atthe monastery she has a few women to act as good mentors already. She needs a strong, in person mentor, but will be reading regularly. She doesn’t do well with theoretical or distant, but needs the personal, as many women do.

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  5. but here atthe monastery she has a few women to act as good mentors already.

    That is wonderful and I’m incredibly happy for her. That’s something that can be quite hard to find today.

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  6. There’s a reason Christ said to stop worrying about tomorrow. Worry about tomorrow takes away from faithful service – instead of being a handmaid watching to fulfill the desires of her master, you become a servant hoping to be served with your own desires rather than served the will of the Lord.

    One of my most-often quoted passages when speaking with women is “Consider the lilies of the field…” Matthew 6:25-34. It is an elixir. To wit:

    Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your body, what you shall put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?

    Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?

    And which of you by being anxious can add one cubit to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O men of little faith?

    Therefore do not be anxious, saying, “What shall we eat?” or “What shall we drink?” or “What shall we wear?” For the Gentiles seek all these things; and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well.

    Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the day.

    N.B. There is a parallel passage in Luke, at 12:22-32.

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